Although we are still 11 weeks away from Delivery Day (at most), I am starting to feel like I must be ready at any moment. And right now, I’m not.

There is so much to prepare. And I’m not even talking about stuff like diapers or a bassinet or carseats or a pediatrician even though yes those are all definitely needed.

All I’m thinking about is the day itself. The actual objects that we’re going to need to succeed. Since we’ve chosen page number Crazy on this little Choose-Our-Own-Adventure, it means there is a ton of shit that we have to have ready when our child decides to join the rest of us.

Birthing tub. Drink-safe hose to transmit water to said tub. Towels. A headband for Lu. Other stuff. Lots of other stuff. Stuff I need to know about, acquire and be ready to use right now, that I simply do not have.

Our friends have a tub we are going to use. But that tub needs to start living in our house. The iPod mix for the Birthing Event must be created. The walls, they have to be padded for when the craziness ensuses so that no one hurts themselves bouncing off of them.

But no. No craziness. That I need to prepare to avoid and deflect at all costs. It is my job to dispel craziness throughout this entire experience. Except when the craziness is the child emerging before me and then there’s nothing I can do but step back and let Lu and the Universe do what it does.

Calmness. Focus. Confidence that her body is meant to do this and that she will excel at this task. Calm confidence will be our path to a beautiful birth. But to get there I have to be ready and there is still so much to do.