What should I be doing right now?  Should I be repainting a room?  Putting together bassinets and cribs?  Practicing the fold for the reusable cloth diapers we intend to use?  Probably, but I’m not.  None of it.  Mostly what I’m doing is walking through the world with my eyes wide and a little glazed over.  That’s because half the time I’m concentrating on the fact that we are having a baby, and the other half of the time I’m thinking about everything I should be doing and I’m not.

I’m still a spectator out here on this side of the womb.  We need to get started on birthing classes and there are videos I definitely need to watch in order to prepare for the actual event.  Although I’m not sure there’s a way to get ready for fatherhood in general, I am certain that are many things I need to do to prepare for the day of delivery.  I’m not a planner per se, but I do like to be ready.  And one thing I am sure I am not ready for is when the baby’s head emerges goopy and real and I’m supposed to be the one that helps it along into the world.

Breathing, concentration, focus, determination, these are all the tools that will help me along.  I’ll probably have to learn how to withstand extreme pain as Lu crushes my hand during contractions.  Gonna be a tough day.  I wonder if they have an epidural for the guy.

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