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It was Monday night when we first found out. The sense of thrill and satisfaction was magnificent. Even though a billion other humans have accomplished this same task, it still felt incredible that it was happening to us. That night she called her sister and told her. We know you’re supposed to wait a few months in case something happens, but my wife couldn’t help herself. She had to tell her. I was fine with it.

Now I want to tell my brother, the one that’s already got a kid. But I can’t. She doesn’t want me to. She wants us to tell him and his wife when we see them, together, because it’s more fun to do it in person. But it wasn’t fair, I told her, that she got to tell her sister, and I couldn’t tell my brother.

She didn’t really have an answer for that besides near-tears and adamant disagreement. It was different. It was her sister, and she won’t get to see her sister any time soon but we’ll get to see my brother soon and we can’t go telling everyone right away.

I didn’t want to tell everyone, I told her. Just him. But she insisted it would be better to tell them together in just a few weeks. I didn’t understand why she could tell her sister but I couldn’t tell my brother even thought I wanted someone to talk to about this, too.

And then it became clear to me that this wasn’t something that had a rational reason. That’s the way she wanted to do it. That’s the way that made sense to her. I still don’t quite get it, but I have a feeling this won’t be the last time I feel this way about something as this process progresses.

There is no reason. But we do have a secret, and I love it.

She was away, and then she came back.  And when she came back, she wasn’t alone.  The two little pink lines proved it.

We’re thrilled!  But it’s still a secret.  Only one other person in the world knows right now and we are going to keep it that way for a few more weeks at least.

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